Waterbowl - Autumn League Game 2
Buckin' Boar Boyz Brawl
“WAAAGH!!!”
The war cry stirred up a primal fear in the stomachs of the Halflings. Hamwick felt the colour draining from his cheeks at the terrifying sound. The ball was in the air and the Orcs were on the move. The green tide crashed against the Halfling players. The Blue Beavers players were thrown across the pitch from the immensity of the Orc attack. Hamwick could see ‘King’ Edgar shouting something on the side-lines, but he wasn’t sticking around to listen. Hamwick wanted to survive. He ran behind his Treemen teammates as fast as his furry feet could carry him, nestling in the root-like feet of Loren Sapp. Unfortunately for Hamwick, the rookie ‘Shakebelly’ thought that this was the game plan. Dodging away from the oncoming Orcs, ‘Shakebelly’ bundled up the ball and ran towards Hamwick and the Tree Twins.
The war cry stirred up a primal fear in the stomachs of the Halflings. Hamwick felt the colour draining from his cheeks at the terrifying sound. The ball was in the air and the Orcs were on the move. The green tide crashed against the Halfling players. The Blue Beavers players were thrown across the pitch from the immensity of the Orc attack. Hamwick could see ‘King’ Edgar shouting something on the side-lines, but he wasn’t sticking around to listen. Hamwick wanted to survive. He ran behind his Treemen teammates as fast as his furry feet could carry him, nestling in the root-like feet of Loren Sapp. Unfortunately for Hamwick, the rookie ‘Shakebelly’ thought that this was the game plan. Dodging away from the oncoming Orcs, ‘Shakebelly’ bundled up the ball and ran towards Hamwick and the Tree Twins.
“What
do we do now?” yelled ‘Shakebelly’, struggling to be heard over the din of the
Orc players and the unruly crowd.
“Now?”
asked Hamwick, “Now we just try and survive!” Hamwick tried his best to push
Loren Sapp forward, straining his little muscles to try and get the big tree
moving. Slowly Loren started. A branch lashed out, smashing one Orc to the
side, while ‘The Sprout’ did the same on the other side of the line.
Edgar
Longbritches looked at the heaving crowd.
“Ah, yes. This will make a tasty payday,” he said to no one in particular. The new recruits were doing well. Linmo was probably the most skilled of the three, which is why he got a full squad name as the new ‘Shakebelly’. That Hamwick lad seemed eager, but not too skilled, so a job on the line for him. The new Clothwick would need to prove himself. Whether he was the fourth or fifth Halfling to have that name Edgar couldn’t recall. But Cats do have nine lives after all.
“Ah, yes. This will make a tasty payday,” he said to no one in particular. The new recruits were doing well. Linmo was probably the most skilled of the three, which is why he got a full squad name as the new ‘Shakebelly’. That Hamwick lad seemed eager, but not too skilled, so a job on the line for him. The new Clothwick would need to prove himself. Whether he was the fourth or fifth Halfling to have that name Edgar couldn’t recall. But Cats do have nine lives after all.
More
and more Orcs hit the Halfling lines. The brave Blue Beavers moved in unison,
dodging the burly green fists and arms as they swung in. Hamwick ducked under a
fist almost as large as his torso.
“Is that all you’ve got?” he laughed, shuffling his feet and dancing around the angry creature. He was only one step into the Stirland Two-Step, when the Orc got its mitts on him.
“Is that all you’ve got?” he laughed, shuffling his feet and dancing around the angry creature. He was only one step into the Stirland Two-Step, when the Orc got its mitts on him.
Edgar
watch on as the Orc grabbed the Halfling Rookie, lifted him high in the air,
and slammed him to the astrogranite.
“Well he did his job for a bit, I suppose,” said ‘King’ Edgar, shaking his head. The team were looking good. No doubt rejuvenated after a week of culinary delights thanks to Heston ‘Blue Man’ Tal sending his apprentice chefs to serve the team for the week. Onwards ground the Halflings, but they couldn’t get past the fleshy green wall on the halfway line.
“Well he did his job for a bit, I suppose,” said ‘King’ Edgar, shaking his head. The team were looking good. No doubt rejuvenated after a week of culinary delights thanks to Heston ‘Blue Man’ Tal sending his apprentice chefs to serve the team for the week. Onwards ground the Halflings, but they couldn’t get past the fleshy green wall on the halfway line.
“Oi!
Ref!” Edgar thundered, “Check that Orc’s hands!” Edgar was sure one of the Orcs
threw something at the Treemen. Loren Sapp, star Treeman of the Blue Angry
Beavers, stamped hard into the ground. Its branches gripped at its face as it
rumbled in pain.
The
last thing Hamwick had remembered was the foul spittle covering his face. He
looked around, trying to discover where he was. He heard the loud voice of
‘King’ Edgar. He could smell the various ointments the other players used
before the game. One of them, Basilisk Balm, was particularly pungent. Hamwick
sat up and shook the stars from his head.
“What happened?” he said groggily.
“An Orc happened,” Coach Lemonleaf laughed, “You’re lucky to have the head on your shoulders after that!”
“What happened?” he said groggily.
“An Orc happened,” Coach Lemonleaf laughed, “You’re lucky to have the head on your shoulders after that!”
The
Orcs had managed to surround the heroic Halflings, yet still they fought on.
Loren Sapp hadn’t moved since the Orc shenanigans, but its sapling sibling had
formed a branch based blockade for the ball carrier. Its sinuous tendrils and
vines wrapped across the front of the Halflings, stopping the Orcs in their
tracks. ‘King’ Edgar’s tirade to the umpires had increased in volume.
“Do I
have to get on that pitch and check him myself, you son of a …”
He stopped. His mouth dropped almost as hard and fast as ‘The Sprout’ had. The same Orc had thrown something at his Treeman. The Treeman crumpled face first. The Orcs swarmed the ball carrier. Edgar raged. Onto the pitch went his pipe. Into the stands he kicked his flask of brandy.
“This is ridiculous!”
He stopped. His mouth dropped almost as hard and fast as ‘The Sprout’ had. The same Orc had thrown something at his Treeman. The Treeman crumpled face first. The Orcs swarmed the ball carrier. Edgar raged. Onto the pitch went his pipe. Into the stands he kicked his flask of brandy.
“This is ridiculous!”
Hamwick’s
head thumped at the racket the owner was making. He could see why. There must
have been some sort of trickeries going on for both trees to act up this way.
The Orcs had the ball, but they weren’t just happy with that. The pitch was
strewn with Halfling bodies. Hamwick hoped that nobody was too hurt. He liked
his new teammates very much in the last week. Ermin was prone and barely
moving. Hamwick could hear him whimpering at the side line. He was no doctor,
but Hamwick could tell that he wouldn’t be the same again. Such a shame, hero
one game, injured the next.
The Buckin'
Boar Boyz’s beefy Blitzer ran the ball in for an Orc touchdown. ‘King’ Edgar
was still shouting at the umpires, too incensed to notice either the score or
the sounding of half time horn.
“What is this? Bring an idiot to work day?” he screamed at the umpires. The head umpire shook his head at the relentless Halfling team owner. Umpires were threatened often, and by bigger than the Halfling. Edgar was about to follow the umpire down the tunnel when Coach Lemonleaf placed his hand on Edgar’s shoulder.
“Leave it boss, we have bigger things to deal with”
Moans whimpers and groans filled the Blue Angry Beavers changing room. The combination of healing balms and cooked meats aided some of the wounded players. Barely a handful of players survived the first half unscathed. Even ‘The Sprout’ had a splinter. Ermin was out for the game. He lay on a table in a separate room, breathing with a nasally whistle as he rested.
“Boss, these things are animals!”
“That thing had a head bigger than me!”
“I want my mum!”
‘King’ Edgar raised his hands. Slowly the players stopped their complaining and waited for the owner to speak.
“Gentlemen and Tree things, this is a mere setback. I see in you, ability. I see in you, pride.” Edgar gestured around, “I see the finest bunch of Halfling players this side of the Drakwald Forest.” That there were very few Halfling teams this side of Drakwald was missed by most of the team.
“What is this? Bring an idiot to work day?” he screamed at the umpires. The head umpire shook his head at the relentless Halfling team owner. Umpires were threatened often, and by bigger than the Halfling. Edgar was about to follow the umpire down the tunnel when Coach Lemonleaf placed his hand on Edgar’s shoulder.
“Leave it boss, we have bigger things to deal with”
Moans whimpers and groans filled the Blue Angry Beavers changing room. The combination of healing balms and cooked meats aided some of the wounded players. Barely a handful of players survived the first half unscathed. Even ‘The Sprout’ had a splinter. Ermin was out for the game. He lay on a table in a separate room, breathing with a nasally whistle as he rested.
“Boss, these things are animals!”
“That thing had a head bigger than me!”
“I want my mum!”
‘King’ Edgar raised his hands. Slowly the players stopped their complaining and waited for the owner to speak.
“Gentlemen and Tree things, this is a mere setback. I see in you, ability. I see in you, pride.” Edgar gestured around, “I see the finest bunch of Halfling players this side of the Drakwald Forest.” That there were very few Halfling teams this side of Drakwald was missed by most of the team.
“Besides,”
he smiled, “we’re kicking this half. Coach Lemonleaf has a cunning plan for you.”
The
teams lined up. Before the ball was kicked, the new Clothwick started sprinting
towards the Orcs. The ball was over his head as he jumped into the Buckin' Boar
Boyz half, ready to catch the ball before the Greenskins had time to move. The
rest of the Angry Beavers swarmed the flank, ready to help their teammate.
Clothwick raised his gloves and the ball bounced out of his reach. He looked
up. The ball rested on the feet of the biggest Orc he had ever seen. Hamwick winced
as the Orc flattened Clothwick. He’d win this game for his friend. The Orcs stormed
into the Halflings. A mass of Greenskins, Blue Beavers and brown Trees collided.
Edgar
Longbritches struggled to see through the dust kicked up by the Orc attack. The
game had descended into a melee in the centre of the pitch. Edgar winced, Halflings
aren’t designed for combat. Nor for bloodball for that matter, they were
designed for eating, sleeping, and drinking. For each lash of a Treeman’s
branch or vine, two more Halflings were hurled to the ground. ‘Priest’ Muggins hurtled
towards the brawl and was greeted by a Blitzer’s fist. Alan ‘7’ Bacon and ‘Cap’n’
Longweed hit the floor shortly after.
“Get out of there!” shouted ‘King’ Edgar, but the Halflings paid no heed. Biting and scratching at their opponents, they tried to push forward.
“Get out of there!” shouted ‘King’ Edgar, but the Halflings paid no heed. Biting and scratching at their opponents, they tried to push forward.
Hamwick
didn’t know where the ball was. He barely knew where he was on the pitch, just
that a Black Orc was currently trying to eat him. The Treemen looming over him
gave Hamwick some hope. He tried to escape the melee to try and figure out what
they could do. He dodged the first Orc, but tripped over the boot of the
second, thudding to the ground. Dazed and confused he watched as the ball was
smashed from ‘Flash’ Gumpfast’s hands and was greedily grabbed up by an Orc
Blitzer, before he ran down the pitch.
Edgar
sunk into his seat. The game was a wash by now. On the sidelines he saw Coach
Lemonleaf becoming excited.
“What’s going on?” he asked his second in command.
“Just watch,” said the Coach, “You’ll see”
“What’s going on?” he asked his second in command.
“Just watch,” said the Coach, “You’ll see”
Cobo ‘Cool’
ran over to Loren Sapp and began clambering up his arm. Coach Lemonleaf had
seen them practice this in training. Cobo pulled his goggles over his eyes and
took position. Into the air the Halfling was flung. Up and up he went, before he
plummeted down towards the Orc ball carrier. The crowd gasped and cheered at
the brave Halfling. Cobo stretched his arms wide to try a flying tackle…but he
kept going. Far over the Orc’s head he flew. Edgar couldn’t look as the Angry
Beavers number 15 smashed face first into the floor. The Orcs stood around
laughing. Well, it stopped the drive for a few seconds, thought Edgar.
Hamwick
looked up from the floor. The last thing he saw before passing out was the Orc
players celebrating their second touchdown.
The
horn sounded and the game was lost. ‘King’ Edgar looked around the dugout. His
team was broken, beat and scarred. After paying the local apothecaries, and
getting a new lad to be Ermin, he would be lucky to have any money left from the
gate. He walked alone to the dressing room, leaving the team in the dugout.
“Hey, you,” he called out, “come here, lad.” A confused looking game assistant walked over to ‘King’ Edgar.
“Erm, yes, Sir?” the young assistant enquired.
Edgar pulled a sheet of paper from his pocket.
“I need you to deliver a message,” he said, handing the paper to the boy, “Now, make haste, and I’ll give you more coin than you can imagine.”
“Hey, you,” he called out, “come here, lad.” A confused looking game assistant walked over to ‘King’ Edgar.
“Erm, yes, Sir?” the young assistant enquired.
Edgar pulled a sheet of paper from his pocket.
“I need you to deliver a message,” he said, handing the paper to the boy, “Now, make haste, and I’ll give you more coin than you can imagine.”
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another game and another 2-0 loss for the Halflings. The game went well for 7 Turns. Then my Treeman managed a Re-Rolled BD/BD in the same turn that the Orcs based all of my Halflings. Painful game, thankful that I only suffered two proper injuries (One by my Treeman). It does mean that I no longer have my wrestle Hopeful, as the -1 Strength would make a S1 'fling.
Next game is against an equally battered Chaos team!
Next game is against an equally battered Chaos team!
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